and so i return again. ..

with the paper routes over with i now have the time and energy leftover in my days for exercising and i'm back to dieting as well. over the course of the last 7 months of letting these 2 things slide, i gained back 10-12 lbs. all my clothes are tight. i feel disgusting. i'm unhappy. i can't breathe. my winter coats won't fasten. ugh. i want to be skinny! skinner than ever before. i must get my mind set on this.

i worked out tues and wed - ran 17 minutes out of 30 on the treadmill tues, covered 2.2 miles, ran 19 minutes out of 30 on wed, covered 2.3 miles.

i guess that i didn't reach my goal of walking/running 365 miles last year but i made it about halfway. that's cool, isn't it? now i can try for that goal again.

and i'd like to lose about 30 more lbs.

so, there you have it. my goals. i could complain and explain all the excuses for why i didn't stay healthy over the past 7 months, but who wants to hear all that junk? the fact is, i slipped. i couldn't juggle it all. now i have to start over again.

i realized driving home from the Y last night that i had been kind of depressed lately. (well, i knew that before...) but i realized that with the weather so yucky, no sun in sight and stress all over the place, i had allowed food to creep back into the spot of being the only thing i look forward to in life. if i had a bad day (which was everyday) i'd console myself with food. and look where it got me! back to fat! exercise boosts my spirits and helped remind me that food isn't really going to make me happy. maybe for a few seconds while i scarf it down but not later when i step on the scale...and then look in the mirror...and then try to fasten my pants and zip my coats.